Number 9 on my Top 5

So I decided to include dating when writing my New Year's Resolution list... Number 9 on my top five.  I've decided to avoid Match.com because it's a waste of money, and I made the Craigslist mistake once too... not again!  So I am sticking to Plenty of Fish, a free online dating site.  Online dating has worked for a few friends, and I've met a few incredible women online, so here's to hope!  Now all I had to do was write a catchy profile, and for this I've gone with an adaptation of sorts from an idea that was used on Craigslist to find a roommate (search Best Roommate Ever).  I did use this at one point in the past, but I've tweaked it a little (and when I did use it, I honestly wasn't even ready to date).  So here goes!  You can also see this on my POF profile, WassilyArcs.

POF Profile for WassilyArcs
I can only assume that my future is reading this right now, so hello for the first time my wonderful better half (can I also say, you are looking really damn good tonight!)... and for those of you reading that are not her, well thank you for stopping by and feel free to say hello, I am all for new friends and you're obviously really cool. I must also assume you are looking for the best possible guy. He's funny, he's handsome, and there's just enough spark to keep you happy. And you (just like I) seriously think you can find them in a random webpage profile. Friends might even ask you, as they have me, "Are you ****ing crazy?" Well, I'm not crazy... and I hope this is a positive in your eyes. I also have no open warrants, no random babies running around, no outstanding parking tickets, never spent a night in jail (though I secretly wish I had), and I've only been caught speeding once. Does this mean I am some sort of perfect do gooder, **** no... I'm just not all that dangerous.

Now why would you believe me? A lot of guys just tell you what you want to hear. Why? Well they want to get in your pants. Do I want to get in your pants? Of course! You're a foxy woman, and after a few dates I am going to romance those pants right off... but until then, I promise to be a gentlemen (well, mostly). What about after the loss of said pants... am I going to run for the hills? No! I just spent several dates getting to know you, I'm not leaving, I'm probably going to want breakfast... my treat! And if all goes well at breakfast, another date! So... am I lying? I can't lie to you... not because it's wrong, but because I know it would hurt you... so I can't mentally do it. This goes for pretty much everyone in my life (excluding work). That means no cheating and no stealing too, cause I just can't lie to you.

So why am I worth your time? I'm going to spend my life trying to make yours better, everyday. You have a flat tire, I'm there. You're hungry and we forgot to go shopping, I'm creating a three course meal dinner impossible style, or calling your favorite take out place, your choice. You think I forgot our anniversary? PSYCH! I get you a thoughtful gift and take you to dinner (minimum)... and I skip any other social obligation because you are the person that matters most. Christmas? I got you that thing you mentioned you wanted 8 months ago in passing, cause yeah I was ****ing listening. Is that all I got you, hell no... 23 gifts from big to small, romantic to practical, I covered all the bases. You had a bad day at work, well sit down and talk to me about it, I'll make you a drink and rub your feet (and yeah my foot massage will turn your day around). You think the bathroom is too small, well I just ripped down a wall and expanded, putting in a two person jacuzzi, grab the champagne cause it's time to relax! You want to go on vacation, well let's burn some personal days and head to Monaco! It's warm, it's on the water, it has tons of history and Paris isn't that far away!

With all that said, am I some mamby pamby pushover? sh*t no, I just make exceptions for the love of my life. I want to come home and give you a hug after my day, and spend time with you, even hear what's new with that coworker of yours. I am out the door when you need time alone, and home when you want to cuddle while watching How I Met Your Mother. I split the chores with you, but I secretly do more just to make your life easier. I split the bills with you, and I pay early. I take you out to just as many dinners as you take me to. I can cook meatloaf, salmon, chicken masala... you're a vegetarian??? I am studying how to cook for you right now... and I can't say I'll give up meat, but I will certainly eat less of it!

What are the dealbreakers? Well I am me, and though I will change a little for you over time, you might not like some things about me. I will divulge these now. I voted for Obama, support a woman's right to choose, and think that gay people should have the same rights as everyone else. I am not overly political, but I do believe we should vote and pay attention. I believe in a greater power, but I'm not here to judge your beliefs or force mine on you. Can I see both sides, yes... and if I am missing one, I will damn sure try to learn. Kids, yes I would love to have kids... in a perfect world. But if the love of my life doesn't want kids, then I chose the love of my life. There are so many other areas in life to spend effort and time, and kids would be fun but so would 3 vacations a year. I drive a crappy car, why? Because I'd rather drive a crappy car to a home I own, than drive a nice car to an apartment. Do I smoke, no... it's disgusting. Do I do drugs, no but I am not anti-drug. Do I drink, sometimes... and I like it, but I know my limits.

Now that this has been said, I like ambiance, good lighting, booths over chairs, windows, I prefer Life over Monopoly by far, but I would really love to find someone that plays a little cribbage or backgammon or Settlers of Catan or Ticket to Ride, I enjoy going to Brewers games, and went to two this summer, I try to grill out or have a bonfire at least once a month, I haven't missed a Packer game on TV or Radio in the last 20 years, I have picked pumpkins from the pumpkin patch and carved them with friends every year for the last four years, I get a real Christmas tree every year, and decorate it with whomever might be around that day, I have two guitars that haven't been played in 2 years, but I still want to learn, I enjoy oil paints over acrylic and watercolor, though I really don't paint that often, it is my goal to play tennis once a week this summer, as well as disc golf twice a week, and hit the gym 4 times a week. I grew vegetables this summer in my garden (yeah that's right, a ****ing garden!). If I had to choose, my drink of choice would be water (no, that doesn't make me boring). Milk is a close second (still not boring!), a good beer is third (right now I'm craving a Central Waters Cream Ale). I love writing, I consider myself a writer. I also love cooking, my favorite thing to make is pan seared crusted salmon with a dijon dill dipping sauce, I make a better meatloaf than your mom (if you don't believe me, we'll duel Iron Chef style!). Vegetable of choice: broccoli.

Someday I want to be a successful writer, win a few awards, and have a huge bank account, until then I will struggle through my cubicle life with just enough money to be happy. In the end, that dream is still just a job. In life I find love much more important. That's where you come in. Have I told you how good you look today?


Why do I like you so much? You know how to relax and love to get out into sunlight and rainstorms. You enjoy boardgames, movies, tv, and are willing to play tennis, maybe even disc golf, build a snowman or sandcastle, and you introduce me to something new every once in a while. You're a woman that loves me for the best version of me, and sticks with me when I'm at my worst. And just so you know, the worst of me still comes with respect, devotion, doesn't cheat, doesn't lie, and has your back at all cost. The best of me is better yet, and you make me even greater.

So I like that you are a procrastinator, but send me a message already!